i could never seem to believe i have anorexia, but i have my doubts too. when i decided to just stay at my regular calorie amount and stop weighing myself, it was like, "wow! i'm finally free." i also stopped letting myself indulge like i used to. that was 1 day a week. i just decided to put off indulging for as long as i could, but still let myself, if i really wanted to. well i noticed my clothes becoming a lot looser. i noticed i could see bones. when i came to church after a month's absence, our pastor just stared at me. and my uncle asked me if i was sick. i finally broke down and weighed myself at my psychiatrist's office, after i told him all this. i also told him how much weight i lost. he told me how much weight i should gain, and how much more i should eat. i've been doing this, but i don't want to weigh myself anymore. my g.p had told me to get another scale and weigh myself TWICE A WEEK! everyone knows how awful it is to be always weighing yourself. my psych. thinks once a week is enough. my husband, grrrr, actually bought a scale the day after that app. i was weighing myself twice a day!! i decided, heck with that, and parked the scale lovingly at HIS side of the bed, and told him to never take my dr's advice for me again. i see my g.p next week, as he'd asked me to make another app. they have both spelled out serious medical consequences which i cannot believe.
my g.p also thinks the amount i added is nothing. i don't want my g.p to weigh me, i don't want to weigh me. i'm scared to gain weight. and i'm scared what will happen if i lose more. i think i really do want to die.
does anyone relate to this?