Thanks for your response Amandalouise.

I can very much relate to being depressed. Having many people move away or die. Rejection. So I suppose disconnection is some kind of safety mechanism. The situation with the therapist has highlighted things right now. I don't think other people would say I am standoffish. They seem happy to see me, which kinda feels weird.

I have been diagnosed with DID as I have different alts in my head that also come out my mouth. Sometimes my body will go into spasms. ect.

This connection thing........ or lack of it, is just making me sad right now.