EJ,

What a wonderful thread.....a chance to look at the GOOD in our fathers rather than the bad (which is all I can do with my Mother)

My dad as an only child, was put into being a caregiver when he was a senior in highschool.....caring for his mother who was dying of stomach cancer. That is a difficult enough task let alone when you are a child. He grew up in Nebraska. He had very low self esteem & was never an outgoing person. I didn't know much about his childhood except that he wasn't very good in school, just getting by but what a difficult way to end his highschool anyway.

He & his family moved out to California where he met my Mother. Both matched each other with their personalities. They got married because he was drafted into the army to fight in WWII. He was over there for about 2 years & my Mother waited here in their 3 bedroom rental home, waiting for him to come home.

My Dad was hit by chrapnel in his leg from our own side & that was the end of his fighting....& was put into a safer place until he was shipped home. After his time in the army, he decided to use his army education money to learn watch repair & go into work with my mothers grandfather. He didn't want to work for anyone. He got no where & wasn't earning enough to even buy a home. My mother wanted to have a family & finally quit her job telling my father that he had to get a job to support a family rather than to flounder around in a nothing job.

That was when he started work with the large aerospace company in California. Looking back to me, he didn't seem like he had much drive to succeed at much of anything & never wanted to be in a position of any responsibility.....too much stress & I guess he had high blood pressure problems for most of his life. Going through all the paperwork in their home (after my Mother died), I found all kinds of certificates for night school courses that my father took to improve himself & learn quite a bit of things......he was much smarter than I ever realized & even though it wasn't college, he did the best he could with what he had.......I should have been prouder of him than I ever was.

He was amazing....if he had something to do & couldn't find a tool to do it, he would create a tool to make the job easier. He was very talented. He was also great with wood work. I have several things that he made (including my daughters wooden cradle & a beautiful wooden close hamper) that I will always cherish. He was also great at teaching me how to drive. From the time I was 13, we would take drives into the desert & there, he would teach me how to drive on the empty roads. He had alot of patience especially with stick shift driving.

There were many times when I was young, I would get very embarrassed by him out in public. He didn't know much about what was going on out in the world around him. but he was a wonderful dad. After I got married, he was always there to help out with things & projects that my husband couldn't have ever done. He was always there for us. When I was growing up, he was never there. He would work nights so he was home while I was in school & was at work when I was home. He wasn't there for most of my life, but when it came to my daughter, he was there for her. he was the best grandpa for my daughter & loved her so much. I am so glad she got the chance to know him much better than I did. It made me feel so great that they had a wonderful relationship. He was great with her. I finally have had a chance to see my dad in a much better way than I did when I was at home & he is so much more than I ever imagined. I realize I had a wonderful Dad even though he hated my going to college because it was putting bad thoughts into my mind.

To my wonderful Pops,
Debbie