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Jul 16, 2012, 10:51 AM
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Member Since: Mar 2011
Location: Northeast USA
Posts: 23,289
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Quote:
Originally Posted by lit fuse
It is discouraging when family and /or freinds think they know what is going on in my mind, or how you got this way.
To make it worse they give some advise that's supposed to solve everything. If I don't immediatley do what they say and am not instantly cured then I am not trying hard enough or not listening.
All this does is make things worse.
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((To all that are struggling in this thread))),
Sigh, I can truely relate to this statement and all of the above. Yes, is is extremely frustrating when other people in our lives think "they" have some quick remedy to our struggles. This happens to me all the time and is a tremendous sourse of stress in my ability to deal with my genuine struggle.
It is really important to make efforts to learn that other people are basically ignorant when it comes to truely being able to understand "our" issues when we deal with some kind of mental illness.
I find that I get extremely discouraged when I get so bad and make an effort to express my need to find better ways to cope. Unfortunately all I am really doing is barking up the same tree that will continue to just stand there with it's own branches of gaining resources to fill "it's needs". So all I am really doing is repeating the same course for my continued disappointment in actually gaining the help and sympathy I really need to my "genuine problem".
The "only" way to fill this ongoing need is to find a "tree of wisdom" that can truely respect our genuine need and give us the correct feedback that "will" help us "deal" and "heal". This is what we call a "therapist" and it takes time to find a "therapist" that we can connect with that can help us learn to "deal" with our very real unique needs that are causing us to struggle at managing our everyday challenges of life.
Yes, often "they think they know", and it is important to remember that "they do not know". And yes, "they will continue to give the wrong answers or guidance" as long as we express our need for a help they truely do not know how to answer correctly.
So be kind to yourself, and go to someone that knows how to actually help, or someone who shares the same issue who can give you some constructive support.
I am not saying to "not have friends", I am saying that you have to find a way to interact with these "friends" on a level of just knowing that they just do not have the capactity to understand "whatever your special needs happen to be".
 Open Eyes
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