I wish that I could say something to make you feel better, but all I can say is I feel the same way a lot of the time. I recently had a CT scan of my abdomen because of pain and was kind of disappointed that it wasn't cancer or something.
It has to be hard just getting the "hang in there" vibe from your Pdoc especially since this is potentially life or death.
I sometimes wonder how long I have to hold on just to save others from suffering.