Quote:
Originally Posted by Gr3tta
If you were a bad person, you wouldn't feel bad about any of it, would you? I think the fact that you feel so much empathy towards others, even when you didn't know them personally, just goes to show that you are a good person.
It would be easier to be a badun wouldn't it? Then you wouldn't care. But you do, so I say you are good. For whatever that's worth.  |
Thank you Gr3tta, that's very kind of you
The guilt hasn't been as bad as it was on Saturday, but it seems to come in waves. I've been trying to distract myself from it by keeping occupied. I guess it's all the depression making me feel guilty for things I haven't done?
Quote:
Originally Posted by fishsandwich
Does playing music or the telly in the background help? I like my voices, but when they annoy me I watch dumb TV. At least the idiots they're screaming at aren't me, then.
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Thanks fish
I play music loud to drown them out when the voices are particularly bad or 'the whispers' are around, because they freak me out. Usually I'm pretty good at drowning my 2 voices out if I keep busy and just let their malice wash over me, unless they get really loud or nasty when I break out the iPod if appropriate. They don't comment on the tv though, except to call me lazy for watching it.
I'm on day 5 off aripiprazole/Abilify. I was certain Fri night that I should stop it (after I'd taken my last dose), then unsure Sat morning and forgot to take it Sat night, which I took as a sign that I should stop it...IDK A part of me thinks that I should take it; a part of me is worried that I'll be told off when my CPN/parents/pdoc find out I've stopped it (I know I'm a grown-up, but I'm a massive people pleaser)
and a part of me is curious to see if the voices come back (part of me wants them to so they can punish me; part of me doesn't think they will come back, like I made it up or something). So I'm all conflicted. So far I don't feel any ill effects from stopping, which gives me no incentive to restart them...
IDK IDK IDK! I'm so confused by it all - meds, voices, guilt, punishment. Sometimes I wish I had someone I trusted who could tell me what to do, because often it makes little sense to me, but I don't really trust anyone, not even my family. Which makes me feel guilty because I know it upsets them that I don't trust them
IDK. I'm waffling again - sorry!
*Willow*