I've been wondering about this a lot lately. I have urges to mutilate fresh dead bodies. I don't desire to kill other than to fulfill my other urges. My morale compass (i.e. it's wrong by God' standards) are what keep me from doing it, but without that I have a hard time coming up with reasons not to. When I watch shows such as Dexter and Criminal Minds, or documentaries on serial killers, it instantly calm me down and I feel release and peaceful. I also feel good when my mind is fantasizing about giving in to these temptations. I feel bad for having these thoughts, but only because others would disapprove. Do you get enjoyment when your thoughts are running through your mind and then get that sinking feeling after the fact or do you get upset during the thought of hurting animals? I use to be so worried that I'd give in. Now I'm confident that I won't because I won't ever quit believing in God, but I do still wonder sometimes if I didn't believe what would happen. I don't desire to go to prison, but the relief I feel during these thoughts is a hundred times more than the fear of death or a prison sentence.