I know what you mean about sometimes the pain being too much. we both have our ways of copeing with the pain which is a really positive thing but i think sometimes theres nothing for me to do but feel the hurt about everything thats happened with him and me, and as long as allowing myself to feel that pain doesnt turn into a self destructive thing i think its healthy. i think feeling hurt is part of this whole process we are going through. like i said before i think grieving is our minds way of healing.
ive been cheated on a few times before i know how awfully painful it is, but i cant imagine being cheated on by someone i'd been with for 6yrs. i think the fact that you feel so much hurt is very understandable considering what happened with you and your ex. but at least now you know that it wasnt just you she cheated on, it seems like she has a lot of issues. i dont know maybe if you guys stayed together your mental health would've gone down hill like hers. maybe you wouldve started having issues of all kinds being around such an unhealthy person. everything happens for a reason. im glad that you remind yourself of how the relationship really was when you get down, thats a good way to pick yourself up and to just be realistic about things. i think down the line when your girlfriend gets her issues sorted out shes going to kick her self in the *** for letting you go. but by that time you'll be snuggled up with someone who actually deserves you.
Your right my ex did push his own self destruct button and I really want to put myself 1st for once but i feel like im still tied to him in someway, i dont want to be, i know i'll never go back to him, but i just feel like i loved him for so long and i took care of him and now all the sudden im sopposed to let go..sometimes i feel like i am done with worying about him but other times i have a thought in the back of my head of him so helpless and brocken down and i feel sad for him, i feel like i dont know anything thats going to give him life again, maybe he wont be ok again, maybe hes just going to live like he is now for the rest of his life, i have a hard time accepting that. but i know i cant help him, i carried him and the weight of our relationship on my shoulders for the last year of it, i did all i could do.