I don't know where you were 5 years ago, Moose, but from the posts I read you seem to be a very insightful person, and this knowledge and compassion had to come from somewhere.
I feel like with my t, I take 1 step forward, and 2 steps back. I have only been with her for 9 months. I just figured it is all part of the bp world.
I sympathize with your feelings after 5 years. I can't imagine how I will react, even knowing a relationship with a t is only temporary. I panicked when she said I was ready to allow 3 weeks between appointments!
I hope your new t can provide you with progress that will be satisfying. I know it is hard to accept the thought of starting all over.
Hugs!
Bluemountains