Lost,
I completely understand your fear of not seeing t for a certain number of weeks. That would be hard! I do want to encourage you to do the day program anyway. I am afraid that if you don't make some changes you could possibly lose t anyway. He ethically can not keep working with you if he doesn't think he is providing you the care you need. Sometimes we have to make hard choices to keep the relationships that we need or want. My t made me do two rounds of DBT or else he would refer me even though I didn't want to do it, he held firm. He has also put me on a 72 hour hold.

I like the idea that other posters have given you about asking him to skype or talk by phone or maybe even have a weekly session at a very reduced rate that you could pay out of your pocket. That would be a great solution. I am sure your t will brainstorm with you to find something that will realistically work. I do agree that it would be detrimental for you to go over 21 days with out any contact with your t. That does not seem reasonable given the circumstances of your attachment.

However, something has to change. Whether you want to acknowledge it or not, your behavior is burning your t out. If you can not learn to reign in your out of session contact and manage your episodes of crisis you will be making a very sad choice not to change. You will ultimately lose your t. That I can garantee you.

Learning skills to manage your life in this day program will give you mastery and competence and greatly improve your self respect. It will feel good. You will learn that you will still be supported and cared for by your t in times that you are not physically together or are in contact. This is a hard thing to do. I know it. I am hoping that you will accept this temporary day program because I am positive it will improve your quality of life and consequently your t relationship.