One of my (past) therapists, when I told him I was interested in BPD, said that they can be a challenge. I was thinking about specializing in that dx, but I did tell him it could be exhausting if all of my clients had that, so I might have to limit how many BPD clients I had on my caseload at once. He said like one would be a good limit.

When I asked if he thought I had BPD, he avoided giving me a direct answer. I really think it fits me. I've looked at the criteria over and over and it describes me. The criteria don't mention "pestering therapists" and "being very demanding and difficult" or whatever else they are afraid of. I am difficult though. I just don't change very easily. But I have never telephoned any of my therapists, at all. I got permission to, if necessary, from my current one. I freak out mildly if she doesn't email me when she said she would, but I don't torture her about it. The previous one sometimes took 6 weeks to respond to email, and I really freaked sometimes about that, but kept it to myself. And when he did finally respond, then I was happy with him again, so that was what he got in my reply. I did obsess about him after he dropped me, and really had a hard time not hanging around where he was, hoping to get a chance to see him, but I tried hard to keep it under control and not bother him.

Nobody has been willing to dx me as BPD, probably in order to avoid stigma, but my current T is treating that. Wish people could call it what it is and work with it, and not insist on making it something else or assume that there is more (or less) to it than there is.

Rap