Quote:
Originally Posted by kiki86
i'm dreading my final session because i think he's going to say something embarrassing that will make me feel really stupid for being so attached to him.
i just can't help but feel that he must think i'm so pathetic and stupid.  |
So, which? I kind of assume (from my own experiences) that the "embarrassing" things he could say would be mushy stuff too, how much he enjoyed working with you?
Or, are you afraid of total rejection; he's going to criticize you for being attached to him? How does that go? What could he say that would be "embarrassing" in that way? I remember when I hung on my male 6th grade teacher's arm and called him "Daddy" and then he later came to my home and met with my stepmother about me (and made me ride home from school with him as he did not know the way); that was not the only problem I had :-)
Would it help you at all to think of it "clinically", you are attached to him, really like working with him, did not get "enough"/good modeling behavior from your father, etc.? When I think of my 6th grade behavior, it helps me to realize that it is not "now," it is an action/situation in the past. It is an expression of what was going on with me (and that my teacher and stepmother didn't quite "get" I don't think, but we're talking 1960-61ish; as a result of their conference, my teacher started calling me by my formal "given" first name instead of my nickname, confusing me no end because I had never been called by that name and only knew the "jokes" about calling children "Charles" instead of "Chuck", for example, meaning their mothers were mad at them?).
Remind yourself you have no experience in this sort of situation so you cannot respond in a right/wrong or good/bad way because you cannot know anything about such situation having never been in it before! Notice what your T actually says/does when you meet again, I bet it will be more polished than what you said?
He's worked in this sort of situation before, he has had time to feel, think, respond, have feedback on different responses, rethink, etc. so his perspective is broader than ours? In 6th grade, I was a 10-12 year old child of the 1950's; my father loved me but was not that engaged in my upbringing, saw me for dinner each night and an activity or two on weekends and that was it? Even if my father had been more engaged with me as a child of that age, I know of no other person of my era who had a male elementary school teacher! How could I know how to respond to him, how could I have learned to? How would you respond to an aardvark?
