Yes, my T has gotten teary eyed on just a few occasions-- twice when I was talking about specific trauma, once when I was talking about not having a mom, and once when I was talking about how my relationship with her has helped heal some of the pain of not having a mom. She didn't get the point of crying; she just had a tear or two that she then pushed back, leaving red rims around her eyes. She didn't acknowledge that she was pushing back tears, but she did say things like "what you shared really touched me" and "It makes me so angry that someone put you through that," "I wish things had been different for you," and "I wish someone could have protected you."

It seems a lot of others have had a negative reaction to seeing their Ts get teary-eyed, but my reaction was entirely positive. I really appreciated that I could SEE her reaction and that she voiced how she felt in response to what I shared. I found it incredibly therapeutic because she validated my experience. She validated that what happened to me was wrong, and she showed me that someone else could care about me enough to be upset by what happened to me. No one else in my life has ever expressed remorse or regret that I had to go through those things. My dad, my sister, and my ex all minimized my experiences and told me that I should "get over it." Seeing my T start to tear up when I told her what happened showed me that it was a big deal and that I deserved to have feelings about it and not just "get over it."

For me, when T starts to tear up a bit, I don't see it as her giving in to her feelings or putting her feelings on me, or making it about her in any way-- I see it as her demonstrating how much she cares about me. She's in touch with my experience and my feelings, and she's showing me how significant they are. If they can have that impact on her, then I know it's "okay" for me to acknowledge the impact they've had on me. It me feel justified and it make me feel cared about.