Hopeful, for certain times in my history I took more medicine than other times. You would be amazed at the growing that has taken place in my life. I am also a believer. I want to let you know that to grow, you can trust the meds, (especially a script that is taylored for your mental condition) I mean no harm, but please stop moralizing so much about medicines that will improve you existance. I no longer take the lithium or the Depakote but for a long time I was on them and they were very very helpful. I also took Thorizine for 4 years and it was a life saver for me. I had some past experiences that needed talk therapy, time and growth. The medicane was able to bridge me to the sucessfulness I have now. I have less than a year to graduate from a community college and a teenage son that is now very proud of me. I learned Journalism, and never believed that God would free me from MY STIGMA of bad mental illness. Right now I could care less about any stigma. I love me and yes love me even though YES, I AM DiFFEReNT. I am proud of myself and Faith Bible Fellowship is VERY PROUD of me for trying to rise about my mental illness, (which I told them about with no fear, because I believed Jesus would protect my feelings from some STIGMATIZATION) and he really did because I just don't care anymore what people think about me and if they think something not good about me, it comes from the devil Anyway, so why let it get me down!