So things smoothed out further. He invited me to dinner again. I just came back. My younger daughter cooked corn herself! Yummy! They are moving to an adjacent city for the sake of a better school district, in a month. I said: "I am going to starve to death", referring to the fact that he has had me over for dinner frequently recently (we live nearby). He said "Well you will get a bike and will be only healthier for it". (I do not have a car and cannot afford one now, I get to work by public transit). So he basically implicitly invited me to their new place already! I thought this would never happen. He also agreed to come to eat dinner at my place tomorrow - I am going to go grocery shopping for that now. And, believe it or not, he and the kids rescued another cat so I am fostering three cats now. And a nice kitty, too. So all is well, basically. I wrote myself an email with the subject line "no emails to him unless he writes and even then think" and I will not archive this email, I will always have it looking at me. I also took BuggsBunny's advice from another thread in the spring in which she recommended that I delete his contact from my phone. It takes longer to punch in the numbers than to just press one button. So that should help me with calls. Lastly, I "took" a letter than I had composed in my mind for him, revised it a bit, and will send it to a good friend of mine who cares about me. It is about something important. I will basically involve friends and this board and the treatment team when I have something to say, instead of compulsively address my ex. I understood that there is no court order, as he put it, that mandates his contact with me. So that is da plan.