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good question, balrog. when you get the urge notice what's around you that triggers the urge. those situations be they people places or things are what right now imho you should stay away from. depression was a trigger for me to drink/self medicate. i went to therapy to understand the reason for the depression to fix it. many times the urge/trigger can be something mundane too. jounaling helped me too. i know it sounds stupid to write down your thoughts but it can inform you of the cause and affect (urge)
thank you for your honesty. i hope this may help you.
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Do not let your fire go out, spark by irreplaceable spark, in the hopeless swamps of the approximate, the not-quite, the not-yet, the not-at-all. Do not let the hero in your soul perish, in lonely frustration for the life you deserved, but have never been able to reach. Check your road and the nature of your battle.
The world you desired can be won. It exists, it is real, it is possible, it is yours..~Ayn Rand
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