i find it really hard to express attachment. to demonstrate attachment. apparantly former t's tell me (via email) that they never were sure whether i liked them or were attached to them or not...

i guess i feel afraid that if i show someone i feel attached to them then i am giving them power... they know they can hurt me. and then... if they know they have the power then they will hurt me and take advantage of me and stuff.

i can't seem to express...

i remember reading about how some people need to learn how to take care of their t's. to make sure their t's wanted to work with them. what do other people to to look after their t's? to show them they like them? i'm trying to figure stuff that i could do that isn't too hard... i don't want to push my t away but i think i probably have been...