Thanks for the suggestions guys, but it's really not feasible for me to get a pdoc. I have highly judgmental parents, and junior year of high school is coming up and I really need to work hard to get into a good college. Pdoc or T are just not possibilities for me. And what would I say? "Mom, I think I might be a little bipolar because of you?"??

I've read how environmental factors can cause bipolar and how sometimes it is just learned behavior from an unstable guardian figure. My mom thinks I'm lazy and that I don't set high enough expectations. Well, if I didn't have high expectations, would I have started SI?! Btw, SI is something that I *used* to do, past tense, I don't anymore + NO ONE in real life knows/ knew about it.

Honestly, all I want is just a *little* stability.