Trigger due to I am talking about suicide.
First- I really like this website right now--
http://www.helpguide.org/mental/suicide_help.htm
Quote:
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Feeling suicidal is not a character defect, and it doesn't mean that you are crazy, or weak, or flawed. It only means that you have more pain than you can cope with right now.
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It is similar to the website I found one day when I was down that said- wait 5 seconds, 5 minutes, 1 hour, 2 hours, 6 hours, 12 hours, 24 hours.... realize that the pain is due to not coping well. Coping skills will help with managing the pain..
My question is -- is there a difference with attempts of suicides?
I don't think so- I think all attempts are part of not coping well-- but my issue right now that I AM Dealing with IS GUILT that a person is Attempting-- As if they try to put part of the reason is due to me.. My Mother has done this to me-- My Oldest sister made well and sure that I knew that our mother attempted due to Me of expressing how I felt and feelings. I realize that with my mom at least-- this was just to get others against me, to hate me, to warn others not tell her their feelings.... Many people do not understand where I stand- even my sisters I am sure may be a little confused, but my mother left me for dead one time -- it is something I have trouble getting over and doubt that I will fully every get over-- due to she was straight forward- "I was pretty sure you were oding but I just left you there"....
I understand that some people will say- Dumb Teenager using drugs- but that is their opinion. It was my bad coping skills at the time.
My recent thing these days is my brother- he has a lot of similarities to our mother I must sadly say--- He has been attempting suicide by laying on rail road tracks, walking into on coming traffic.... and another one here not too long ago (just found out last Sunday- with something).
For a while now- i have told him to get help.. he needs a therapist- I keep bringing up better coping skills... and ya know what I am ignored.
How do i deal with this? i keep saying a day at a time--- but I am just so tired.
There is more to this story of my brother a lot more.... My sister thinks I should tell him how I feel, how he effects me (i.e. I shut down after we talk due to how he treats me)... I don't think he really cares.. I have told him in the past with our first detaching on how I felt and got it used against me.. so if anyone can understand I may not up forth with that.
i do feel guilt- i just wish I could take away all of this and have him better and myself better but I can only work on me.
Has anyone else dealt with attempted suicides like this?
I have had a friend that committed suicide, friends that were close to death not "attempting" like my brother or my mom has.
I sound like a real ***** to say-- serious attempts of suicide and then less serious attempts of suicide--
No matter what I think is serious- it does come down to coping skills... I will not debate about that.
i guess I am just -- not enough sleep, tearing myself apart for well the last two weeks a lot on this and i am just so tired.