im sitting here drinking wine and 10 minutes into it...BAM...im hearing external voices. its getting bad. theres this man laughing. and this woman telling me what i should do.

mistake im sure.
i always forget what happens when i drink. i dont drink often. but a year into my 21st year of life im already drinking more and more. not in one sitting but overall i mean.

my parents think i have been depressed lately.
i said no. but oh well. alone....drinking...not leaving the house......
thats not necessarily depression right?
BUT i did cry today when i had this vision of my dad dying and
this bleak look into the future....

oh well.