Perna Question: What is to leave out of hand. I have copies of the deed to our home, titles to vehichles, copies of all the tax info, copies of our check book inside where you track how much you've written out. To use as proof of what our electric bill is, car insurance,phone bill.

Leed thanks for the info. I have just now opened a checking account for the first time ever. I'm 38 and have never had a checking acccount or a credit card. So I have no credit. My H's name is on everything. So I really have nothing. But with the advice of my in home councelor I got my first credit card and first checking account just a few months ago, in May. My H has always been against me having control over money. But the in home counceling was court ordered to be here and he was court ordered to comply with what ever the councelor said. So I got a credit card and a checking account much to his disliking. I don't have much $ because I don't have a job. I have put in what ever I get for B-Days and other special ocassions. As for a shared account we do have a personal checking and my name is on it in the event of emergency or DEATH. I can get to the money. Otherwize I am not allowed by him to write checks without his approval first. If it is for my own personal use I give him the money so he can deposit it and then I am allowed to write a check. I usually just use money orders. That way what I do with the little bit of money I do get my hands on can't be tracked by him. He never has to know.

Our T's visit went suprisingly well. I don't look for this to last. He is so calm and plays the role of a bible preaching and believing christian. It makes me almost want to barf. You can't pick and choose the words and use them as you please. The bible was not made for that. I think the T sees through that though. This is just the begining and I don't know from day to day what I want.

Thank you both Perna and Leed for your time and answers.