Yes, I came to understand that too; I kept a low profile because to be noticed by my stepmother was to be criticized. So, anything out of the normal where I was stuck in the limelight, it was like, "what am I doing here, I don't belong here" as I tried to scramble out of the way. I still vividly remember being in the hallway for some classroom misdemeanor (talking, passing notes, the usual) and wondering that, "How'd I get here? I shouldn't be here!" It's like I'd forget my role :-)