No client is to blame for their therapist burning out. I've had therapists burn out on me. I actually asked the last one if it was me. If I was the reason. she told me no. therapists are just like normal people. they have things that happen in their own life that makes it hard for them to work with their clients

for example One of my therapists came very close to burning out. her mom died. She was the executor of her moms will so she had to travel out of state to take care of that. so now not only do you have a therapist going through the grieving process but one with financial problems because it takes loads of money to travel every couple weeks to another state. for court hearings and mediations because relatives are contesting the will. Add to that lets say the therapist was a single parent of a preteen boy who was having problems with the father.and this preteen boy was a challenging child who needed special schools and so on. then you add to that the prospect that the therapy agency she worked for was going through lay offs due to government cutbacks. add to that being a cancer survivor so she has all the worries that come along with going through cancer treatment and surviving and the no guarentee that at any point it can come back. lets also add depression and a survivor of abuse to the mix because alot of therapists go into the business because they have been through what thier clients go through. Now add some clients to this. before the therapist mom dies therapist is seeing clients one a DID sexual abuse survivor who became suicidal because she did not take care of her depression and DID by remaining in therapy and on medication. As a result child is placed in foster care temporarily. and when the child is returned the child is now violent and attacking the client. Top that off with clients lawyer has forbidden the revieling of the DID diagnosis which leads to the client having to lie on what symptoms she has on comprehensive psychological evaluations so as not to reviel her diagnosis but yet lawyer has told therapist and client to just work on the diagnosis and get it in control so now not only does the client have to hide the diagnosis but the therapist is also put through stress because she has to be careful how she documents sessions, therapist now has to keep two separate set of files for this client. Add to that the client is a self injurer and throws a table at the therapist while dissociated. add to that a DHS caseworker trumping up charges against the therapist of such things as seeing the client too much, not seeing the client enough, having an unethical relationship, and so on.

Does this mean the client is to blame for the therapist burning out - no

The bottom line is therapists are in the job of being a therapist to hear about everyones problems and so on..

I don't tell LL every time I dissociate. Does that mean that I am to blame should she ever go though burnout becaus I was not "nice enough" to let her know whether or not I dissociate around her.

No LL burning out would be because LL wasn't taking care of herself by not taking vacation time when she needed to, seeing her therapist to keep her problems in check, staying on her medication if she's has any to take an so on.

LL's burning out has nothing to do with how much I tell her or include her in on as to if she is helping me or not.

I base how mush I tell her on me not on her, I do consider how fast I tell a therapist something but that is based on my 20 plus years of experiencing telling somethings in a too forward way and has gotten me locked in a nut ward or two. so now I take time to explain things in such a way that the therapist doesn't have a chance to yell or lock me in some nut ward because I left out a crutail piece of information. I take time think ok if I walk in to a therapy office with afresh cut bleeding all over the place thats a sure ride to the nut ward but if I walk in and say to my therapistbeen having thoughts agian but I when I think about it anrd wrote about it I know that I am not going to do anything that therapist is going to say ok do you know what triggered that reaction. one situation gets instant ride and the other gets discussion. For my own protection I take the time to find the routes that lead to discussions not the instant rides.

If I do know my terapist is unfamiliar with something and so on I don't take my time because I am afraid they are going to burn out and if they do its my fault because whether or not they burn out is not my fault. I do so because they respect me enough to take their time when they see that I am unfamiliar with what they are doing and saying. You might say I treat my therapists the way I want them to treat me - with respect as a human being.

But as far as me telling them things and including them in on things so they don't burn out no matter what I say or do... if they are going to burn out they will even if I am the queen of manners and the best client on earth. Therapists are human and they have their problems just like I do.

So I don't take it on to myself to keep them f4rom burning out. thats their job as a person in the field of therapy work.