Like many other users of this site, I know the feeling of hopelessness all too well. I know how tough it is to see beyond the pain but what has helped me the most is to take each day at a time and set small goals for myself.
Unfortunately, some things are simply out of our control. Our past, our biological makeup, the way others may perceive or judge us. As hard as it may be to push those negatives aside, try to focus on the aspects of your life that CAN be changed for the better. Please hang in there. You'll be in my thoughts.