I am so emotionally drained and depleted.
I am tired of feeling hyper and then crashing and feeling down more and more each time.
I have been finding ways to numb it all out.
I will not feel pain anymore, at least right now I am swearing to be dead to pain.

I will not do anything life threatening. But, at the same time I feel like my life is already dredged and gone.

HE killed me when I was 12.