Last year I was diagnosed with bp II after being treated only for depression and hypothyroidism for 7 years before that. Other than my husband, my late mother, and my sister, I never shared any of my treatments or dx with any extended family members.
Now, after dealing with difficulties and med changes for the past 9 months, I have decided to take a break from work. With this decision, my husband thought that it would be necessary to share info. about my dx, pdoc and t appointments with my in laws. I also told my brother because, at the time, he had been prescribed wellbutrin for depression, although he refused to take it. As a side note, my 12-year old son also is being treated for a mood disorder, which my in laws already knew about.
Now, just as I feared, I have strong suspicions that I have become a source of family gossip, instead of what I had hoped would be respect for the privacy I have protected for so long. We are from a small community with mostly family living in close proximity; however, my immediate family (me, h and kids) live 3 hours away.
Last night I was talking with my brother. He told me that my mil had told him about my dx (he already knew). Her conversation began with, "Don't tell anybody, but". Keep in mind that this is my mil telling my brother. Even though they live near each other, there is no family connection between the two. You can see where this is going...I can only imagine what she has told her own extended community of family members!
Also, I found out how much support I can expect from my brother. In his words, it has been his experience that people who are diagnosed with bp are just looking for justification to act totally crazy, not work, and to have legal access to drugs. He is surprised that I allowed this dx, since I have never been "drug" crazy.
Right now, I am hurt by my brother's reaction. He grew up in the same alcoholic, abusive household as me, and he knows that my mother and father both took meds for mental illness.
I am also angry with my h for feeling the need to share, even though he knows how fast news travels in that community, becoming more sensationalized with each teller. His reasoning was that we are always on a tight budget with four kids, and occasionally our in laws help with kids' expenses (their choice, not us asking).
If you've stuck with my rant about my frustration, thank you. I can't believe how ignorant those who are close to me choose to be. I hope all of you are living in a much more supportive environment.
Bluemountains