the reason I havent responded was because you seem to have already made the decision to not feel whatever you are going through and nothing I say can make you feel in fact I know from experience that sometimes numbing oneself is needed in order to be able to put things into perspective and decide what to do about the situation that has caused me to decide not to "feel"

I was also confused by the statement of - being killed at twelve. you are obviously physically alive otherwise you would not be able to post this thread. So I figured it might be an emotional thing in which you are taking a break from feeling. If someone is taking a break from feeling something I honor their needing to take a break. So I thought when you are ready you would come back to post more so that we would all know what was going on so that we could help. All I can do for someone who says they "will not feel anymore" is to wait for them to decide to connect mentally again.

As for the idea that no one has posted to your thread. I personally dont look at threads as in how many people are posting to one person or one thread. I post to threads when I am able to, based on if I have experienced what they are going through and if I can help. I don't always get to each and every thread and post because I am going through my own stuff too.

I personally believe everyone here is doing the best they can posting based on when they can and what they can offer or when they need help themselves.

I also believe that on line support groups should be a suppliment to a person recieving help in real life. alot of on line support groups say right in the rules that on line support groups are not meant to take the place of real life help when in crisis its time to contact a professional in the persons local area.

I hate to see someone going downhill just because people in on line support gorups dont always see and reply to each and every post and also may be going through their own problems at the same time when someone needs help so please take care and contact your therapy professional when you need to ok.