These are some ideas from the book "She's Gonna Blow." They are meant to help control anger.

1) Sometimes a person can stop a volcanic reaction by concentrating on physical reactions. Breathe deeply and slowly, thinking about this process. Concentrate on relaxing the facial muscles. Roll the shoulders. Stretch the hands out, which might be balled up into fists.

2) Remember that being angry doesn't mean you have to act on it. Try not to do anything until you have calmed down. You might need to go into a different room. If you can get into the kitchen, then you might open the refrigerator, stand in front of it, and literally chill out. At least close your eyes and count to ten, if you can't get away.

3) Anger can be dealt with through physical activity and exercise. Scrub the floor, do jumping jacks, run up and down stairs, etc.

4) Try not to speak until you have gained control over yourself. This strategy helps to prevent some kinds of emotional abuse.

5) TRY to think of ways that the child has blessed your life.

6) Vent in a journal.

7) Here's a hotline number for CHADD, for getting help with children with ADD---1-800-233-4050.

I would also suggest that you go to the library and/or a bookstore and find some books on dealing with kids with your son's problems.

I hope that's a beginning anyway! Let us know how you are doing. You CAN vent here, if you'd like. I suspect, too, that some other folks here might have kids with some of these disorders and they might be able to help. Figure out how to write a thread question that will get folks to notice the issues your son is having. More than one thread if you need to!