SM - A year? Wow. When are they coming back? That must be really difficult.
We are going to a cottage this weekend coming up. So I'll have 4 days with my mind off things, which will really help.

Thanks everyone else for your support and hugs.

A bit off topic but need to write:

Something that isn't helping is my husband. He has picked up this habit of teasing me.
Tonight after dinner I felt sick and went to the bathroom and was being sick. I came out and he didn't even acknowledge my presence. I asked him to kill an earwig in the bathroom and he did. I got upset that he didn't ask if I was okay. Just seems like the right thing to do, no?
A huge argument ensued and he got mad at ME. Turned the whole thing around.

Anyways, we resolved it. I told him I'm tired of him teasing me. Just pointing out things I'm doing wrong a lot of the time. It's getting really tiring and I'm trying to fix my shattered self esteem in therapy. He just listened and didn't say anything.. then later kept doing it. Treating me like I'm stupid or like a child. He obviously has issues with me I just wish he would confront me on what's bothering him.

He is really passive-aggressive. It's kind of crazy making.

I'll need to tell T about this. Wish I could reach out right now to him.

Trying to focus on the cottage and all the things I need to do this week. Time to go lay next to my husband who won't acknowledge my presence.