There are two different kinds of love... There's telling friends that you love them, and there's telling your partner that you love them. In my opinion, if you're with someone new, you should not be sweet talking to get the ex off your back. Frankly, I don't see how that could work. Getting them off your back would be cutting contact completely and give time for wounds to heal and for everyone to move on. At least, that's how it would be in my book. Maybe later there can be friendship, but there better not be any hiding it from your someone new.

I'd have to agree with you, Lorra. I'd have a lot of trouble trusting someone who said he stilled loved his ex. It sounds like, to me, that he wants to have his cake and eat it too. Granted, I've never been in any situation like this before. But, I agree you should sit down and have a serious talk with him. Try to be non-confrontational, and just have a calm discussion, because truly, you want the best for both of you. And maybe the best isn't being together... I know that hurts, but you have to do what feels right to you. If being together is what's best, then you have to come up with a plan on how to deal with this, which will take a lot of time.

Good luck. Keep posting, keep venting, we're here for you.