Hi there. My husband has been married before with 2 kids and for the first 10 years of our relationship I had to put up with frequent references to her and contact. He used to take her out for dinner every friday night and I tolerated that. He still to this day claims to "love" her and says he always will because she is the mother of two of his children. It was very hard to tolerate but I did and now after 20 years she only rarely comes into the picture. I have accepted it under the belief that she bears no grudge with me; is not threatening to my relationship and is not harmful. You have to understand that this woman will always factor in his life because there is a child involved. You are his current partner and hopefully his love and loyalty is with you. As long as you feel secure with him then she can come and go and you won't feel threatened. Work on trust in your relationship to help you through this and then both of you will feel secure with each other and be better able to tolerate contact with ex partners. Your love for each other needs to be strong enough to carry you through these petty jealousies. Whatever you do don't go back on drugs as there is absolutely no benefit either for yourself or in your relationship. It's just a quick fix but not a solution. Go easy on yourself and focus on your relationship and strengthening that. All the best