I was ritually physically, emotionally, and verbally abused for years but what really still chains me to this day was the one incident that became a sexual assault.

When we've been violated in such an awful way it's humanely impossible not to become overwhelmed and stricken with trauma even years after. Never blame yourself, and it's not because you are weak or can't handle stressful situations. What happened to you is beyond normality, and thus your reaction would logically be beyond "normality" as well.