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Aug 02, 2012, 02:57 AM
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Member Since: Oct 2010
Location: Michigan
Posts: 6,543
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Hi my friend ~ I was married to a man JUST LIKE him. I was with him for 26 years.  When you're with someone like that, you become like that. When they verbally and emotionally abuse you, you strike back. It's a self-preservation tactic. It's normal to try to defend yourself. At first you say "I am NOT a so-and-so" but then you end up saying "You're a rotten $$^$#@^#" and it just goes on and on. He will throw things and curse & swear when he plays his little games cause he can't win, just like a little kid.  He makes noise all night long, so you can't sleep. You get so darned mad, that you scream at HIM too. It's a vicious cycle. You can't change him -- no way.
You're doing the very smart thing in getting OUT of there -- but I'm sorry you have to go back to your alcoholic mother. Isn't there any where else you could go? Can't you rent a room somewhere or a small apartment in a subsized complex? Social Services can help you with finding a place that you can afford. It would be better than living with your mother.
At any rate, I'm glad you're leaving this man. That is NO life, believe me. You'll just end up a resentful, cold, woman with no future. God bless you and will you PLEASE let us know what happens? Keep us posted on your progress, ok? Take care. Hugs, Lee 
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