Honestly I can't remember the exact reason why I started SI'ing because it has been so long ago. I'm sure that a lot of it stems from my father's death 27 years ago and the feelings that go along with a sudden, unexpected death like that. At first I SI'd because I was too scared to do what I really wanted to do and that was kill myself. It relieved the pain that I was feeling so I kept on doing it and have been doing it most of my life now.

I used to be ashamed of my scars but I'm not any more, they are a part of my past, they make me who I am today. My wife knew nothing of my 'secret' for most of our marriage, I always blamed them on 'accidents' or getting cought up in the rose bush while I was mowing. I told her a few months ago and she has been nothing but supportive of me, as she has been for all of our 23 years together.