I wasn't ready when I tried even the smallest confrontation. All I did was call and listen to his voice on the answering machine. I cried for hours uncontrollably and it took weeks to get over the horror of that voice. I don't know what I planned to do if he had answered himself, but I guess that shows just how not ready I was.

But I did learn a few things from this experience. As with any other part of recovery, be gentle with yourself and be patient with yourself. Of course, be ready for big steps when you take them. But also be proud of the courage you are showing in even making it this far to even think about confrontation. It really shows that you want to assert yourself and your rights. To me, it shows you standing up for yourself. You can be proud of that even if you decide now is not the time to confront, if ever. No matter what, you are reclaiming yourself and that is worth rejoicing.

Be well,

mtd