(((minefield))),

Well, you got an ear full from your dad that you didn't expect. I can see why you feel that something bad must be in your family genetics. But you have to understand dear that it is not "just genetics" involved with people who do bad things to others. Alot of this comes from how people are raised and even exposed to early childhood abuse.

Sweetheart, you need to go back in general history so you can allow yourself to see that often families practiced incest and even married within families. It was also not unusual for people to be married and have sexual partners on the side somewhere.
There was also murder done to family members just for power as well. We have come a long way in being "somewhat more civilized" than not so very long ago.

It is also no secret that often when parents get old, the children often fight over possessions and money and it is amazing what people will do when it comes to money. While your father "could" write a book, so could many and if people really talked about "family secrets" it would be pretty alarming how much goes on behind closed doors. Now more than ever many people "do" talk and there is more awareness of the many "bad" things that really take place.

So please, don't just think that it is only "your family genetics" that are "bad" somehow. That would not be true to the reality of the many families that have some bad skeletons they hide behind some kind of facade of "squeeky clean appearances".

I am sorry that you had to experience being raped, unfortunately you are also not alone in that experience, thousands of females get raped each year, some very young and innocent.

What you can do for yourself is work on healing and knowing you are worthy to do so.
Know that you do not have to partake in the bad out in this world of the many that do harmful things to others. Humanity is far from perfect.

(((Hugs)))
Open Eyes