Quote:
Originally Posted by SoupDragon
Thanks button30 - I really respect your discipline in sitting for 30 minutes a day - I know I must get a regular practice together in order to move forward, but for whatever reason, I just don't make the time. It has been hard letting go, or unpinning my anger from those I have attached it to, I am absolutely amazed how far I have come in the 2 + years of seeing T.
There have been so many times when I have been ready to throw the towel in and T has managed to keep me engaged, this really has come from nowhere and has floored me in some ways - it feels like I have been clinging on to that side of the pool, too scared to let go and float without all that stuff that I have been so familiar with, I have been thinking maybe that is why I am scared of telling T, in case T gets me to swim further out - I think I just need to get a little more comfortable with this sudden shift first.
 |
I can relate to your anger Soup as mine spurs mostly from attachment too and how the people I have attached to have hurt me terribly. T has helped me to realise that I have chose this pattern and sometimes I self sabotage, I have no idea why I do this as she terminated with me before getting into it (another example of people I attach to hurting me).
We and only we are in control of our lives and the choices we make directly affect our lives, its not that its my fault this happened to me but I have to take respnsibility for my choices...I dont know if this makes any sense to you Soup, but sometimes you have to leave the paddling pool and plunge into the deep end to float on your own and feel free.