Yes to your first question. And I self treated it as an addiction because I felt like the doctors were just trying to slow me down instead of fix the problem at hand. So I started thinking of it as an addiction and thats how I beat the psychical part of it, not realizing I had made no progress on the emotionaly side where I unintentionally seek out painful situations in life. --- Today is gonna be a tough one; I don't get the sanctuary of work later, and home life is too slow for me. I always feel like I'm not getting enough done; always looking for something more to do. That usually puts me on edge with the people around me and causes home to be a very stressful place... And I'm out of ciggarettes until Wednesday... I'm worried...