I usually start to cycle more towards the holidays. That's when things usually get ugly for me.

I've seen a few of your posts now, and I think you sound like a really cool person! I too have fear of leaving my house sometimes. I wish your family would back you up more, it sounds like they don't.

Is it possible that you can plan a short, short walk outside? just around the neighborhood, down a street or two? That might really help the depression. Also, start taking vitamin D if you avoid the sun. It too might help with depression.

I read posts like this and I know there is not much I can do from here. I hope a friend knocks on your door, motivates you and takes a walk with you and listens. Really, that's what we need sometimes, is not to be alone with our pain, but have someone to share it with.

You can pm me if you need to vent. .... I'm a good listener