Hi guys. Thank you all so much for writing and taking the time out to write thoughtful comments. I have been reading them and thinking - and it helps to have a sense of that it's not ...just me, you know?

Leed, I am seeing a therapist. She's not specialised in PTSD, like Open Eyes suggested, but she's pretty good; in fact am going to see her today, so let's see what she says. The rages were pretty bad back in November, and I started seeing someone then. It's unfortunate that that particular therapist wasn't great and didn't inspire much trust, but I'm glad I've found my T now.

Vickie, thank you for your comments. I am intrigued by the question about molestation (and not at all offended, worry not!). It's weird because I have a SENSE that something did happen (thought I'm sure it wasn't with my father, who is a lovely and very kind man) but I have no memories of any such abuse. Maybe it could be a different kind of abuse, no less traumatic, but not sexual? In your understanding as a student of professional counselling, is that a possibility?

George: I have! And in fact you have said the same before... I want to clarify; are you saying that I may be needing to think about the relationship in general and whether it's healthy for me? (Because some friends are saying this too... very disconcertingly). It also seems clear that us taking space is important- which is what we're doing. Which in itself is a little disturbing, because I'm afraid it will not lead to any resolution.

Open Eyes: Thank you for writing that... It helps me to know that others have experienced this too: having a valid reason for anger, but the anger in itself being disproportionate. I am going to see my therapist today; let's see what she says.

Hellion and Lonegael: From what you guys are saying, managing the sources of the stress is as important as managing the stress itself? I can understand that. It is worse on days where I am stressed out and everything is a mess. That normally leads to an "episode" or whatever.

Really, really... thank you. ((((((((Everyone))))))) This is very helpful and my need for support and meaning is really being met.

Love and hugs.