You are definitely going to have to toughen up about him. Love is something that goes 2 ways....if not, then, it's NOT LOVE....it's only what you wish it was. You can not hate someone & you can forgive them for being the jerk that he is....but that's NOT LOVE either.

You need to get tough also because you are going to have to make sure he stands up to his support of your daughter & you will have to probably fight for it.....& if he doesn't pay the child support, he's probably going to test his ability to get away with not paying in the childish ways that all children test their boundaries......first time he lands in jail for not paying (which is what you can make happen if that's what he chooses to do is not pay) then he will know that it's a serious offense that he is doing by not paying the support.

He is so absolutely childish & actually pathetic. He is who he's always been, but sometimes people hide their true selves until something challenging comes into their life that they can't handle & now is when you see who he really has been all the time but had it well hidden.

I am sure that if you knew what he was really like before you got married, you wouldn't have wasted your time on him let alone agreed to get married......but I think if you really look, there have probably been signs of this behavior through the few years of your marriage that your foggy newly wed mind wasn't willing to see.

Hopefully when you have your baby, that protective instinct will come out & you will go into that mode against him if necessary. Hopefully he won't make it necessary, but from the sounds of his behavior....I doubt it.

Your lawyer will be good at taking care of your best interest. It is sad when a marriage ends up like this & his reasons are so lame.

One should NOT feel guilty for blowing up when you have been pushed to the blow up level. It's passive agressiveness on their side that pushes up to that point. No, it's not the best way to handle it, but it's not because they don't deserve it.

I am going through a divorce situation right now also....but it's after 38 years (I left him 5 years ago) because of the jerk he was 38 years ago when I married him & he never changed. I hid in my career & ignored it, but the fighting & was horrible & I know our daughter has issues because of it & surprised that she does as well (she is now 34)....but all the issues we have because of our parents.....can imagine all the issues our children have because of the issues we have in our marriages.

In reality, it's a good thing you are getting out NOW before it ends up getting really ugly because I can tell you, after years of dealing with someone who is passive aggressive & who is in their own selfish world....you think your blow up was bad & you felt bad for it....I know many of us who put up with years of that, ended up feeling nothing but anger & doing nothing but yelling by the end.....better to get out now before you feel nothing but the anger