Hi Minefield
You know I understand what your saying my friend it is only in the last 10-20 years that people are open and talk about and share experiences and realise that things that are not acceptable in some families are really not okay.
Personally for a long time most of my life I thought that it was normal for a mother to be jealous of her daughter and belittle her everyday to make herself feel good then I found out that I was not the only child to have been through this and that there were support groups and multiple books written about it. Yet being a mother myself I have never felt that way about my own children
I realised in my teens that grand dads aren't suppose to sexually abuse their grand children when they are young because it society had lifted the taboo of talking about paedophilia and incest.
I think your Dad is from that generation that keeps what happens behinds close doors...private.
The more evolved the human race becomes we seem to learn from our mistakes and verbalise it to prevent things happening in the future generations because we are OPEN.
I hope this helps a wee bit