first to get help with the ssdi stuff, get a lawyer, and most work on a contingency, meaning if you dont win they work until you do or you dont pay, and when you do pay it is out of your award. second, you are in a new area, go to the er if you have to, ask to see a mantal health councilor or after being checked by a doc as to see the social worker who will have answers for you, explain you dont want a hand out, but need help, and if your grandma is that bad off you may need to bring in social worker anyways for help, there are medical ride programs that can get you to your appointments and other places that can keep you in housing, you just have to go ask people... (I used to be an advocate for people in your situation, there is help, you just have to do the work)