coatofdreams,

I agree with Scotty204. Just because the daughter is 13 years old doesn't mean that she has come to terms with reality...especially because the mom & dad aren't introducing other romantic interests to her for so long. Imo, that only increases her natural hope that her parents will someday get back together again.

In case you don't recall, 13 yr-olds can be little stinkers sometimes in defiance. I would advise you to believe your bf, but now would be a good time to sit down and have a talk about how he and his ex's techniques to relieve their daughter's pain may be mis-firing. Perhaps they should seek the professional opinion of a child psychologist on how to help their daughter adjust to reality.

Hopefully, that idea will be accepted by him and his ex. If not, then maybe it is time for you to let go of the relationship. Because you shouldn't have to be his invisible gf for so long! Best wishes to all of you