Emotions are the expression of your feelings. One cannot control their feelings anymore than they can control their thoughts; a feeling "happens" or a thought "pops" into our head. What we do with it, how we express it, is what we can usually control. However, control by not expressing our feelings is not just "strength" but a cage we are trapped in. Without expression, the feelings logjam and you know what happens eventually with a logjam, http://www.mainememory.net/artifact/23079/.

Like the logs in the logjam, the feelings we have are good, helpful, useful to us! One wants to work with them, organize them into nice rafts and get them down the river of expression, apply them to our personal goals http://www.linngroveiowa.org/LogJam.jpg.

Nothing happens suddenly, with relinquishing control (a habit) or logjams. One has to work log-by-log to straighten things out and get an orderly flow. Pick a single, "easy" experience or instance and tell T how it makes you feel, as you are feeling it. Maybe even start with this frustration and the worry and pain you are feeling over changing your control habit?