I emailed. It's all 'out there'... and I feel like a complete raving lunatic. My therapist IS good - my therapist is great, in fact - which is why I feel awful for doubting her over what will probably turn out to be something and nothing... but... oww!! ****ing OUCH! I still can't believe she wrote what she wrote. But I feel like it's me that has caused all of this, because I should trust her enough to know that she didn't mean it, or that it came out wrong, or she was having a batty moment, or something... because this is my T. My T. And now I've made it into a big deal and she's going to hate me. If she'd have just spoke with me today, for like five minutes... It was so hard to hear 'no' after convincing myself to reach out. She's never been this unavailable to me before - which only added fuel to my fire of abandonment and rejection issues... but like, what? I expect her to be on call 24/7? I know how unreasonable I've been, don't think I don't know, but... Oh GOD! ANYTHING else, she could have said ANYTHING else to me... but 'were you not being truthful...'? REALLY? After everything?