I have been married and divorced MANY times (thank you, bipolar disorder), and helped plan a few weddings in addition to my own.

Back when I was planning my weddings, I was SO into it, worrying about every tiny detail, and I let it consume me. Each wedding got bigger, fancier, and more expensive. (The weddings are, in fact, some of my big "manic regrets" and I am incredibly embarrassed now that I had these huge weddings.)

Advice?

Don't let the wedding control you. Just don't.

Nobody cares how thick the paper is for your invitations, what colors you choose, what font you pick.

Nobody will remember what your dress looked like unless it's God-awful ugly or doesn't fit well.

If you look pretty and you're happy, that's what they'll remember.

Nobody will remember the songs or the readings. Nobody will remember if the napkins at the reception had your name and dates and a design stamped in them, or what color they were.

So don't worry about that stuff.

Just do something tasteful, that makes you happy, that you can afford, and let the truly important stuff shine.

What's the truly important stuff? I guess it depends with each couple. To me, the most important stuff would be the sentimental stuff, really slowing down and living in the moment that day instead of feeling like you're on display and rushing through it all, spending time with loved ones (especially those who travel to be there).

Big, flashy weddings aren't "real life."

Spending tons of money on one day isn't wise for most couples.

But stepping back and figuring out what's most important about the day and keeping it from becoming a monster can take a lot of stress away.