I know you are having a really difficult time, you are struggling real bad but I have noticed something, you also have a great willpower, a great instinct to survive.

With all that battle that is going on inside of you, you still do try to found some interest to keep you going as your website and the beautiful things that you are creating for some of your friends here. You are also one of the first to reply to people who needs help and guidance here. Maybe you don't realised this or maybe you do but you are keeping your mind very busy wich is extremelly good that you do. This is really good coping skills. You are helping yourself and you are not quitting, this is really great and I hope you are proud of you because you deserve to be proud.

I really do hope you feel better soon! ((((((((((((Dave))))))))))))))))

Take good care of yourself and keep going forward!
nightdream