Exist4543: I really hate to tell you , but people are gonna have a very hard time reading your posts. there is no punctuation. no organization.
It is near impossible for me personally to read any of it.
but I feel for ya.
If I was asked to take my best guess, Id say you seem manic. at least hypomanic.
just by the way you wrote.

Please get to the doctor and let them help you.
It really aches me when I see someone go through something I know I have been through, and hated afterward.