That would be really tricky to bring up, especially if you are uneasy at the moment because it is an opportunity for him to let you down at least that is what I would be fearing. But you are a better person than I because i would have been all over that to get it but i have no scruples in that sense - you don't get if you don't ask - this was a philosophy that helpped me become a successful business woman and earned me the big bucks until i had a melt down and lost it all. Yet despite that when it comes to asking for something like that which would be fantastic if it happened it would be like setting yourself up for hurt which is a terrifying prospect. It sounds like you feel your T understands you so I am sure he will be understanding of you for asking. I would suggest pretending to write an email about it to him but not send it and see how it feels to do this activity. May be a daft suggestion but that has helpped me before when first telling my GP why i was in utter melt down, i pretended to write her a letter then a couple of months later when I had to hand in a form I just dropped it in with it. Bang pow puff done on an impulse but it was the first step and I am glad I did it. You could store your email in drafts until you are ready.

I feel this connection you have with your T with my GP and what I would give to have her as a real and permanent feature of my life. I am very much attracted to her though and know it would never happen in a million and one years but it does not stop me wanting it. Sometimes I think it is the only way I will feel safe enough to let go but it will never happen. The only comfort I can take is that she is a partner in the practice so hopefully not likely to go anywhere anytime soon but she could leave me what would she have to give 4 weeks notice. I would have no time to recover she would be gone out of my life I only have faith and confidence in her without her I believe I would be dead already. It is an absolutely terrifying thought.

Have you had any romantic feelings towards your T? does that make you feel uncomfortable or unsafe at all?